3-hour gestational diabetes test.
😭
😭 
Can I be honest with y'all? This kind of rocked my world 2 weeks ago on top of everything else we have on our plates right now. I haven't talked much about it because I felt a sense of embarrassment and shame that I failed. I'm a health & fitness coach! I've done this pregnancy SO MUCH HEALTHIER than my first and to find out I failed my 1 hour test really got me. There was a part of me that felt like a failure...like I could have and should have done better.
Here's the truth about it. It rocked my world but it's not the END of my world. I don't normally eat breakfast at 7:00am but when you're told you have to fast and not eat, YOU'RE HUNGRY! haha! Why does that happen?! The drink itself was SUPER SWEET (2x as sweet as the 1 hour -- but same amount of liquid). It reminded me of a defrosted Icee popsicle -- super sweet liquid sugar. I drink SO much water as it is, so not being able to guzzle a bunch of water after drinking it was hard but I chose not to focus on it and tried to keep busy for the 3 hours. I did take my FAVORITE tumbler from RTIC so I had something to sip on. I also took my laptop to do some work so the time went fast and I was able to be productive (perk of having a mobile business!). If you're a reader, take a book! I already did my personal development for the morning, so I opted for work time. I also opted to have my blood drawn from different arms every other time (4x total). My last tip is to take food with you so you have something to eat before you leave! You will be hungry (possibly hangry!).
On a more sympathetic note...what I learned (through a number of sweet mama friends who also shared they failed their test and some have/had gestational diabetes), there really isn't anything I could have done different. My mid-wife reassured me IT IS OK and I'm doing great and we will deal with it if I have it to make sure me and baby girl are healthy. But I still had the question WHY? WHY ME?
On a more sympathetic note...what I learned (through a number of sweet mama friends who also shared they failed their test and some have/had gestational diabetes), there really isn't anything I could have done different. My mid-wife reassured me IT IS OK and I'm doing great and we will deal with it if I have it to make sure me and baby girl are healthy. But I still had the question WHY? WHY ME?
I have learned instead of asking God WHY He has allowed something to happen, ask Him what He wants me to learn from it. Easy? No. Easier than beating myself up and having a pity party? Yes.
This morning my devotion was about God not making mistakes. While sometimes that's hard to accept in the midst of chaos, uncertainty, pain, sadness, anger, confusion, and hurt...it is the truth.
God always has a purpose for our pain, a reason for our struggle...AND A GIFT FOR OUR FAITHFULNESS!
I'll just be sitting over here for the next 3 hours...waiting for my gift.
XO XO
XO XO
